


Talking with Andrew

by G8rguy



Category: The Fosters (TV 2013)
Genre: Jonnor - Freeform, M/M, TBAA
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-30
Updated: 2015-07-30
Packaged: 2018-04-12 00:36:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4458611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/G8rguy/pseuds/G8rguy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Several days after episode 3x01 where Jude and Connor are outed:  The bullying at school is getting too much for Jude.  Several of the guys both in their grade and above have been saying cruel things to both him and Connor and now it was escalating to physical shoves and pushes into the lockers, tripping, and throwing things at him.  It was easier on the days that Connor was there, but it didn’t seem to be getting better.  He was trying so hard to walk away like his moms wanted him too, but he was starting to think that it would be better if he and Connor had never gotten together to start with.  At least then no one knew for certain and Connor wouldn’t be facing this too.  But a conversation with a stranger helps Jude see something about himself he never realized that may help.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Talking with Andrew

Jude walked out of the school trying to avoid seeing anyone. It had been a bad day. The taunting and teasing had been particularly rough this morning and he wanted to avoid everyone, including Connor. Maybe if he wasn’t there Connor could have a lunch without all the stares and whispers. What did we do to them? Why can’t they just leave us alone? It’s not fair! It’s not right! 

Walking along the beach Jude just wants it all to stop. Before they were together Jude was invisible to most of the school. Sure some of the jerks like Jeremy and Blake would make fun of him if they were bored, but most everyone else just didn’t know he existed. That was not the case anymore. Now he was the guy who made one of the most popular boys in their class gay. The one who was causing everyone to be upset. The boy who made everything worse. He tried not to, but the tears still slid down his cheek. He just wanted to be left alone, to be himself – what did we do that was so wrong?!?

_Back at school_

Like Jude, this day wasn’t a good one for Connor. While people in his grade rarely risked physical confrontations with him, some of the older kids did. But today, like most days it was the snide comments, whispers, and slurs directed at him and Jude. Connor wanted to confront every one of them but he knew that (1) Jude would hate it if he did and (2) it wouldn’t do any good. Like roaches, most of them scurried off when the lights went on and others could see them. They preferred to spread rumors, vandalize their lockers, and say things online about them. 

But it didn’t matter when he was on his way to see Jude for lunch. Connor knew that as long as they faced things together, they could deal with anything. He trusted Jude like he never had anyone before. Jude made him feel strong and vulnerable, brave and scared, bold and shy – all at the same time. He understood when people talked about finding someone who made them more than they were before. 

Connor’s used to watch old sports movies with his dad when he was younger and he remembered watching one of his dad’s favorite movies “Jerry Maguire.” It was a rather cheesy old Tom Cruise movie and while his dad loved the tough sports world and him yelling “show me the money” it was when Tom was looking at his wife, in the middle of all those people, unafraid of them watching and said “you complete me” that he liked best. Connor never understood that scene till he had Jude in his life. It was like there was a piece missing from him that he never even knew about that was suddenly there.

Connor stepped out into the courtyard and headed for his table, but he didn’t see Jude. Sitting down he scanned the crowds assuming that Jude was delayed in class or something. Waiting to eat, he was starting to get worried when Daria sat down next to him. “Where’s Jude?” she asked Connor.

“I don’t know. He should be here” Connor replied. “I saw him in 2nd period, but not since.” Connor pulls out his phone and sends a text.

Conner: Jude? Where RU?  
**No response**

Conner: Srsly…RU OK?  
**No response**

Getting worried Connor dials Jude’s number but it goes straight to voicemail. “Jude, where are you? I’m at lunch. Are you okay?”

Daria watches Connor and sees the concern in his face. “How did I not see this before?” she thinks. Looking back over their time together she can see that the signs were there but she was too in love with the idea of being Connor’s girlfriend to pay attention. When Connor had broken up with her she had cried…a lot. The worse part was not knowing why, but on that day on the beach, hearing him say he was with Jude…it made it better, somehow. She was sad, but she understood. You couldn’t control who your heart wanted. 

Daria had been dealing with Connor and Jude’s outing in a way as well. A lot of people thought that she must hate one or both of them and seemed to take pleasure in saying horrible things about them to her. Daria was clearly learning who her real friends were. Many of the girls who she thought were her friends seemed to enjoy saying nasty things about Connor and Jude to her, but they never asked how she was doing. Seeing the real side of people made Daria start to seriously re-evaluate how she acted and she had started to make some changes.

“Let me text Taylor” Daria said “they have class together right before lunch.”

Connor looks at her trying to decide what is more important – his anger at Taylor or the need to find Jude and it’s no contest “Please. Anything she knows.”

Daria: Taylor. Was Jude in History class today? He is not at lunch and Connor is getting concerned.

Taylor: Yes. He left before me and when I went outside I heard some of the jerks saying some things to him and then he ran off. I thought he was going to lunch.

Daria: He never made it.

“Taylor said he was in class, but he had a run in with some of the guys and ran off. She thought he was coming here” Daria told him.

“What?” Connor said his worry increasing “Who? What did they say? Where did he go?”

Daria: Can you come to their table?

Taylor: ….

Daria: Please

Taylor: k

Daria looked at Connor’s worried face “She is on her way over. We will find it out. Just calm down a bit.”

Taylor walked up having been nearby “Hey” she said quietly not meeting Connor’s eyes. They hadn’t talked since that day when she admitted what she had done to her friends. She didn’t know what to do now and she couldn’t seem to find a way to fix this.

“Taylor, please tell me exactly what happened” Connor pleaded.

Taylor swallowed and knew this wouldn’t be easy, but she owed him. She told them how Jude had left class before her, not looking at her as he left and she saw Jeremy, Blake, Danny, and Mickey all snickering and watching Jude leave. Their attitude and expressions were cruel as they headed out after Jude and she was worried so she walked after them.

She saw the four of them confront Jude, smaller than all of them individually, as they called him names and taunted him for “ruining Connor” and “infecting their school” and how everyone would be happier if he would just leave and never come back. They walked off, but not before making sure to “bump” into him repeatedly, shoving him into the lockers. Not enough to be called out as being anything other than careless or rude, but not fighting.

She had caught Jude’s eyes, saw the hurt in his eyes and when he looked at her, betrayal. He turned and headed away from both her and the boys heading outside. She thought he would go to Connor, but when Daria texted her, she didn’t know.

Connor was done waiting. Getting on his crutches he moved quickly back inside and knew exactly where to go. He wanted, he REALLY wanted to go after those guys. He wanted to make them eat their words and wipe the floor with their faces but that would wait. He needed to make sure Jude was okay and for that, he needed help.

Knocking on the door in front of him Connor waited and when the door opened “I can’t find Jude and I think something is wrong.”

Lena stood there looking at Connor for just a second “Come in Connor.” Hobbling in, Connor came in and turned to Lena. “Tell me” she said simply.

Connor told her everything that Taylor had said and that Jude wasn’t responding to his texts or calls. “Connor honey, maybe he just needs some time to deal with this.”

“Call him” Connor pleads “if it’s that, he will reply somehow.”

Lena understands. Their being outed hasn’t been easy for Jude and she remembers her own struggles. Picking her phone off the desk she sends a quick text.

Lena: Hey honey. Can you come to my office for a second before your next class?  
**No response**

Lena knows that he is on break so there is no reason not to reply. She calls the number but it goes straight to voicemail.

“Okay Connor. Let’s give Jude a little time. I will go by his next class and check on him okay?” Lena says trying to calm him down. “Just go to class and let me take care of things.”

Connor struggles. He wants to trust Lena, he knows how much she cares about Jude and that she will fight like no other for him, but he wants to fix this now. Finally nodding, he heads off to his class promising himself that he will be back right after class to find out what happened.

Twenty minutes later Lena walks to Ms. Lopez’s classroom and looks in and doesn’t see Jude. She catches Ms. Lopez’s eye and signals her to come over. As she steps out into the hall “Adrienne, did Jude show up to class?” Lena asks.

“No Lena” Adrienne replies “I haven’t seen him today.”

Thanking her, Lena walks into the hall and pulls out her phone and activates the “find my phone” app for Jude. She wasn’t sure about it when Stef put them on the kids’ phones but now she was glad. Turning it on it showed that she was with 50 feet of the phone. “What?” Standing in the halls there is no one around. The boys’ bathroom is on the other hallway and the only thing here is….” Lena walks straight to Jude’s locker and turns the combination. After a couple of incidents, Lena had memorized Jude’s locker to make sure that he wasn’t being targeted and opened the locker and sitting on top of the books…Jude’s phone. 

Shutting the locker she heads back to her office. She needs to talk to Stef. Skipping a class is bad, but hardly the first of our kids to do that. But not taking their phone with them, that is something different.

_Back on the beach_

Jude figured that he was definitely going to get it when he went back. Not only did he skip lunch, leave school, and now was skipping afternoon classes, but he had left his phone. Jude knew that Connor had probably already sent several texts or even called to find out why he missed lunch. Leaving his phone had meant he didn’t have to ignore them or pretend not to be there. He could say he didn’t know. It didn’t occur to him that Connor would go to Lena for help or that his friends and moms were starting to worry about him yet. He figured he would go home later and maybe have figured out what to do by then.

Looking up Jude realized that he had walked for nearly forty five minutes and was far down the beach from the school. He looked around and saw a bench in the grass under a tree so he went to sit down and watch the waves. He felt overwhelmed again…he tried to remember what Lena had said about how it was other people’s problem for not accepting them, but that was so much easier to say than to believe. He sniffed as the tears started flowing again. 

“Tissue” said a soft voice next to him.

Jude looked over and saw the mentioned tissue being held by the man sitting on the bench next to him. Surprised, Jude had never heard the man sit down, but looking at him, he seemed nice. He wasn’t looking at Jude while he held the tissue, but Jude studied him. He was older, but not as old as his moms, but he looked nice. He was wearing a white shirt and khaki pants and his brown hair was a bit long in the back. He looked over at Jude and Jude smiled. He had such a kind face, the face that tells you to trust him.

Taking the tissue Jude says “Thank you.”

“You are welcome” the man says and looks back at the ocean.

Neither of them talk for a while, just sitting there. Jude remembers all of his moms and Callie’s warnings about talking to strangers, but he doesn’t feel like a stranger. He just seems…good. It’s confusing.

“Want to talk about it” the man finally asks?

Jude looks back down and looks at his hands. There was no pressure or demand, just an offer. 

“By the way” he says “my name is Andrew.”

“I’m Jude” Jude replies.

Andrew smiles “Jude…I like that name.”

“What? No Beatles joke?” Jude laughs softly.

“Oh, that’s a great song, no doubt. But I was thinking of the real meaning.”

“What do you mean?” Jude asked.

“Jude is short for Judah. In the bible it means ‘Praise’. And of course, St. Jude is the patron of lost causes. The one who is called on when all other avenues are closed. That is a pretty impressive name” Andrew smiles as he continues to look at the water.

Jude frowns. He never heard that before. He always thought his name was from the song. He never thought any further. “Don’t suppose you know the meaning of Connor?”

“Irish…means dog lover” Andrew smiles. 

Jude snickers thinking how appropriate! He always heard people, including his own family, compare Connor to a giant puppy…seems his name fits.

Looking at Jude laugh Andrew smiles “So, who is Connor?”

“He’s my friend” Jude looks down ashamed that he said that. 

Jude looks back at Andrew but he is just sitting there smiling as he watches the waves. He doesn’t know why, but he feels he can talk to this man. He seems nice.

“Actually” Jude says softly “he is my boyfriend.” Jude watches Andrew to see how he reacts but other than a slight smile, Andrew continues to look out at the ocean. 

“He must be pretty nice” Andrew says after a few minutes.

“Yeah, he is” Jude says.

“Then” Andrew says slowly “the big question is why are sitting here instead of sitting with him?”

_Back at school_

Lena is standing at the front of the school as Stef pulls up in her uniform and cruiser. Stef gets out and hugs her wife. “What’s going on hon?” Stef asks. Lena explains Jude’s absence and the phone in the locker.

“I was at home, so he is not there. Is there any chance he is still at the school?” Stef asks.

“I didn’t do an announcement because I didn’t want the word to get out that we can’t find him. Connor is already upset and I don’t know if he just needed to get away for a bit. He had a run in with some of the boys who have been causing trouble for him and Connor.”

Stef is angry. She really wants to just grab those kids and shake some sense into them. Jude just touches Stef like none of the other kids do. She knows it is because he reminds her so much of Lena, that combination of vulnerable but strong.

“Okay. Before we call out the guard, especially since there is no indication of foul play – the boys that caused the problems are still here?” Lena nods, she had already checked to make sure of that “then why don’t I drive a bit and see if I can find him. Maybe he went walking?”

“Okay” Lena says fighting her desire to send out the Army to look for Jude and knowing that she can’t.

“Excuse me Officer” they hear a voice coming from the beach.

Stef and Lena turn and see an older African American woman walking up from the beach towards them. She looked about 70 or so, but still looked pretty active for her age. She had the most amazing hat on her head and a hairstyle that seemed to embrace the great deal of gray hair on her head. She was wearing a flowing cream colored pant suit and carrying her shoes. The most remarkable thing about her was the smile on her face. It was so genuine and warm both of them couldn’t help but smile back.

“Can I help you ma’am” Stef replied?

“Well, yes. I am really embarrassed to admit this” the lady said as she stopped in front of Lena and Stef “I was driving along the beach and decided to get out and walk to the water. It is so beautiful here, you have a lovely city. I just started walking along the beach and would stop every so often. I stopped for a few minutes at a really love spot, but I think I got turned around and now I can’t quite figure out exactly where I am in relation to my car.”

“Oh” Stef said “do you know where you parked?”

“Yes. It was right next this little shopping center. When I walked out there was a seafood restaurant that was over the water. I think it was called Cappy’s?” she said.

“Happy’s” Lena said. “It’s about 3 miles from here.” 

“Three miles?” The lady said “oh dear.” She didn’t look like she was up for a three mile hike back to her car, Lena was surprised she had come this far.

“Why don’t I give you a ride?” Stef said “By the way, I am Officer Foster, but call me Stef.”

“Thank you so much baby, I’m Tess” she says “but it looks like you are doing something official here. This is a school, yes? I don’t want to be a bother.”

“It’s okay” Stef says “I am not here on business actually, I am just checking on my wife.” She smiles at Stef and Lena smiles before turning to Tess to see her smiling even brighter.

“That is so sweet” Tess says “people get so busy nowadays and think that phones and computers replace simple human contact. I love it when family members remember to show they care. It’s what makes a family strong.”

Lena is slightly stunned. Tess is from an older generation and she was prepared for no reaction or a negative one, but not one so positive and reaffirming.

“Well Tess” Stef says smiling at Lena’s shock “let’s go find your car.”

_Back at the Bench_

Jude sighs. How to explain this. He doesn’t want to deal with all of this right now, but somehow the idea of talking to Andrew seems like a real option. He doesn’t know me or anything. Maybe I can get a real answer about things or at least figure it out once and for all.

“Big sigh” Andrew says. “You probably hear this a lot, but it seems you are a bit young…” Jude tenses up, knowing that he is going to say something about how he doesn’t know how he feels or it’s a phase or wrong or something “to be having serious relationship problems” Andrew finishes. “I would think you would just be enjoying spending time together instead.”

Andrew looks at Jude and sees the surprise on the boy’s face “what?”

“That’s not the usual reaction when people hear I have a boyfriend” Jude said.

“Oh” Andrew smiles warmly “what’s the usual?” 

“Usually they either say I don’t really know how I feel or that it’s wrong or that it’s a phase – and that’s if they are being nice” Jude says sadly.

“And if they aren’t being nice?” Andrew asks gently.

“Well there is the classic fag comment or using other names. Telling me how terrible I am and ruining our lives and so on” Jude can’t keep the bitterness out of his voice.

Andrew doesn’t say anything for a few minutes, just looks at the waves. “That is very sad” he finally says “I feel sorry for them.”

Jude looks at Andrew “he feels sorry for THEM?!?” “WHY?!?!” It takes a moment for him to get his composure back to speak clearly “Why would you feel sorry for them?”

Andrew looks over at him and Jude almost loses it seeing the sadness and compassion in the man’s eyes. “Why? Because their hearts are so small, so damaged, so in pain that they think that by making others hurt like they do that somehow it will make them feel better. People who hate are the saddest ones of all Jude, because they truly do not know how to love. You can disagree with someone, not like their choices or beliefs, but when you hate…you damage a piece of your own heart and soul. Hate is a terrible thing that damages the one who feels it as much as it does those who suffer from it.”

Jude finds he can’t speak. He listens to Andrews words over and over in his head. It feels so…right.

“Don’t think that means that what they do – the cruelty, violence, abuse, and torment are not terrible things because they are. But do you know what is worse than all of that?” Andrew asks not looking at Jude.

“Those things seem pretty bad” Jude says softly thinking of how he has dealt with them so many times before.

“They are” Andrew confirms and then looks Jude right in the eyes “but the real violation is not simply harming someone else, but making them believe that they deserved to be harmed. Blaming their victim and worse, getting the victim to blame themselves, they don't just hurt the body, but they wound the spirit and that, is truly a terrible thing to do.”

Jude feels sick hearing Andrew’s words. This was him. This is what those students had done. This is what the foster father Callie rescued him from did. He believed he deserved what they did. That he had brought it on himself. 

“And Jude” Andrew said interrupting Jude’s thoughts. Jude looked at Andrew “no one deserves that. No one is wrong for being true to themselves. Your heart speaks to you and only you hear what it says. If it tells you that Connor is right and he feels the same…then it is right. Don’t join in with those that want to hurt you by believing them.”

The tears fall from Jude’s eyes. Tears not of fear or sadness or anger, but release. He had been holding so much inside that he didn’t even realize it. He was always waiting for things to go wrong because deep down, he didn’t believe he deserved to be happy. But he did. He deserved it the same as everyone. And somehow, this kind stranger had managed to help him let go of that damaging belief and find the strength to let go of all the fear and doubt he was also holding onto.

Not exactly knowing why, Jude reached over and hugged this stranger. Andrew allowed Jude to cry it out knowing that he needed this. 

After a few minutes Jude let’s go and composes himself. “Sorry” he says quietly. 

“It’s okay” Andrew says “there are not enough hugs in the world nowadays. Tell you what…I am going to get a drink of water. Will you be okay here?”

Jude nods and wipes his tears. He thinks he is done crying, but he is glad he did. It felt good to get it all out.

Andrew stands up and smiles at Jude and then walks towards the small store in the shopping center while Jude looks back at the waves feeling better than he has in a while.

_Back at Stef’s Car_

“So Stef” Tess starts “tell me about yourself. Obviously married…any kids?”

Stef smiles “Yes. Five.”

“Five” Tess smiles “oh your home must be full of such joy.”

Stef looks at Tess and sees genuine happiness in her face but agrees “Yes. Drama too, but lots of joy. It has taken a lot to get here, but we have found the kids who have made are lives complete.” Why is she saying this? She rarely opens up to others so quickly.

“Found the kids” Tess asks?

“Well, our oldest is Brandon from my first marriage, before I realized I was a lesbian” Stef looks over at Tess but sees no judgement in her face, just curiosity. “After Lena and I were together we fostered the twins, Marianna and Jesus, for three years before we adopted them, and then last year we took in Callie and her brother Jude. We adopted Jude this year and are in the process of adopting Callie. Gives us five kids between 13 and 16, crazy but amazing.”

“That is so wonderful Stef” Tess says smiling. “Providing a home to children is one of the greatest gifts you can give to those who need a family.”

“You are so not what I expected” Stef says quietly.

“I get that a lot” Tess says with a laugh “but love is love. People get too caught up in things that don’t matter and forget what does. Can I ask you something though?”

“Sure” Stef replies turning into the shopping center where Happy’s is located. 

“It looked like you and Lena were upset about something. Anything you want to talk about?” Tess says gently.

“Our youngest, Jude. He is having a tough time. He recently came out and has a boyfriend, but they are having to deal with some people who don’t accept it. Former friends, schoolmates, and Connor’s dad for a long time. Today was tough and he walked away from school and we are not sure where. It’s only been a little bit, but he didn’t take his phone with him, so we are concerned.”

“What does he look like?” Tess asked.

“Brown hair, brown eyes. Getting taller every day, but still pretty skinny for his age – nearly 14” Stef says.

Tess looks around. “There she is, there's my baby. Stop here!” Tess yells and points. Stef stops the car next to a beautiful red Cadillac convertible and they get out. “Wow Tess, nice car.” 

“Thank you, that’s my baby” she said smiling. “Stef? What was Jude wearing?” Tess asked.

“Jeans and a t-shirt. Why?” Stef asked.

“A green t-shirt?” Tess asked.

“Yes. How did you know that?” 

“Look at that bench under the tree” Tess says pointing. Stef turns around and even from here she can tell it’s Jude. He is sitting there looking out at the water and she smiles in relief. “Seems we both found our babies” Tess says happily. “I will let you take care of yours. Thank you again.”

Stef walks over the bench and sits down without saying anything. Jude doesn’t react when she sat down, he seems so enthralled by the water, but she can see the red in his eyes and knows he has been upset.

“How are you doing boo?” she says quietly.

A smile plays on Jude’s lips and he looks over at his mom sitting next to him. She looks concerned but also happy. He reaches over and hugs her tightly without saying anything.

Stef wraps her arms around him and pulls him close. They stay like this for a few minutes before she feels him pull back.

“Thanks for coming to get me” he says. “Always” Stef replies. “Do you want to talk about today?”

“Sorta” Jude replies “I mean I feel better. I talked to a really nice guy and he helped me see something that I didn’t realize about myself and the people that have been picking on Connor and I. I would like to tell you about it.”

“What guy” Stef said. 

“His name was Andrew. He was really nice. We just talked for a while and he went in to the store a few minutes ago” Jude said. “He helped me realize that I was not upset just because I was getting picked on by those guys when they said and did things, but it was bigger than that. It started when Callie and I went into the system and has continued up till now, I think. I believed that I deserved to be treated like that.”

“What do you mean Jude” Stef said starting to get worried. “Why would you think that?”

“I don’t know” Jude replied. “I think that somehow I always was afraid that things would go bad because of something I did. I mean I liked Connor and we decided to be boyfriends and as a result of that he had to deal with Adam and the kids at school. People were always picking on me even before because I was different. Then some of those foster homes where they treated Callie and I so bad. I guess I got to the point where I didn’t feel I deserved to be happy and that somehow I was responsible for all the things that happened to me.”

Stef wants to scream she is so mad but holds it in. She tightens her arm on Jude’s shoulder as he talks, but he isn’t crying or scared. It almost seems as if he is talking about someone else entirely.

“But I realized something today” he continues. “I deserve to be happy. I deserve good things. And if Connor and I make each other happy, then everyone else is wrong. Not us.”

Stef feels the anger melt away. She feels such love for this young man sitting with her. It has taken her years to understand what he is saying in her own life and she still struggles with being okay to be happy and not scared of losing everything. Her son, sitting here at nearly 14 years old, is already finding a peace that makes her smile.

“So what do you want to do?” Stef asks.

Jude looks at her “I want to go back to school. I left my phone there and I am pretty certain Connor is flipping out since I missed lunch and didn’t answer any texts or calls. I owe him an explanation too. And I am done letting others make me feel ashamed anymore.” Stef is overwhelmed with pride that he has overcome this.

“And I guess that I have to talk to momma about missing class too” Jude finishes looking at Stef with a hopeful look in his eye.

“Well” Stef says “I suppose that I can write you an excuse this one time. But not again, promise?”

“Promise” Jude says smiling. 

They get up and head to the car to go back to Anchor Beach.

 

EPILOGUE

Tess pulls the car around and stops for a second as the door opens and closes. As she pulls out of the parking lot she smiles at the person sitting next to her. “Good job baby. Nicely done.”

“Thanks” Andrew smiles back. “He is a really good kid. He will be okay.”

“I am sure of that” Tess says with a smile. “He is exactly where he is supposed to be -- with his family. They will all be okay.”

**Author's Note:**

> Tess and Andrew are from another show, but I liked that one so bringing them in here felt good.


End file.
